Can anyone give me the name of a company, an address, a telephone number, or even a website, that could help train me up to become a celeb?
I'm sure, that given the right training, I could bring my standards, morals, and intellect down to the correct low level needed, and strut around all day totally consumed with myself too!
Getting pissed, taking drugs, flashing my bits, shagging around, getting arrested, and a holiday in rehab, is a small price to pay to get noticed! ( I could also make a few bob, selling my pointless and uninteresting kiss and tell autobiography too!)
Do the Government have any special training schemes to help me?
If the A list can do it, so can I!
It can't be that difficult!
The Worm..................
PS. I have just started my own training programme, by shouting out loudly twice a day, a 1,000 times: ME! ME! ME! That's a good start don't you think?
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